Your life, full of ups and downs!

Very easy to say, 'One's life is always full of ups and downs'. But, extremely difficult for the person who is going through this ride. All of us have been to funfair. Have seated in the roller-coaster ride. We scream, we laugh, we make that frown face, and then we expel happiness. There are few little things that create such feelings. You live through each of these feelings because of those tiny little things such as butterflies in your tummy when the ride goes up, a fear when the ride gets you down, the happiness in your heart when you see that beautiful surrounding from the top, and suddenly that fright when you look down that tells you are going to hit the bottom of the earth!

Similar feelings are experienced in our lives as well. Nothing big, I've said. All of us are aware about this ups and downs. What I want to mention here is - Life is NOT like a roller-coaster ride. I beg to disagree with all those people who compare life with a roller coaster ride.

When seated on a roller coaster ride, you are aware about the next move. You know it is going to stop after a while. Regardless of the feeling, you know you are going to come out happy experiencing all those ups and downs. The moment you are out of the funfair, you are no longer going to remember these feelings.

But, with life? Life doesn't tell you what's next. The feelings that come with the ups and downs of the life do not come with an expiry date. They last forever. It creates everlasting memories. Happiness and sadness leave golden footprints on sands of time. The up time of life always make you remember the down time of your life. You're happy today, but you'll never be able to let go the sad times you once had. The people whom you left behind. You're sad today, you'll never be able to forget the happy times you once had. The people who were a part of that happiness aren't standing besides you today. Ups and downs are not opposite of each other. These are the lines that run parallel with your life. The sadness will always make you remember the happiness you once had, and vice-versa.

Hence, I would say life is not like a roller coaster ride. With the passing time, the feeling of sadness and happiness may not be there forever. It may come and go, but, the memories that it created will gain a permanent residency.

The real motivation

All of us need motivation. All of us have idols. Sometimes, these people can be celebrities who have worked very hard to earn the much-needed fame or are someone from our own lineage.

What about people who are younger to us? Can they become our ‘motivation’? Maybe, our kids? How can kids motivate us even being younger to us by at least 20 years. They haven’t earned that experience yet, and can't even spell the word correctly!

Aahana, my 9-year old  has exhibited such motivational acts many a times…

She has friends who regularly bring healthy snacks in their tiffin. What about Aahana? I reach home - tired, exhausted, hungry, and at times breathless! Thankful to my mother and cook, I don't have to contribute much in cooking. But, there's a lot of domestic work that must be completed before we hit bed. So, when Aahana shouts, "What shall I pack in my lunch box, mamma?" the most common answer she gets from me is, "Put those high-fibre biscuits, a handful of khatta-meetha mix, and some pieces of khakhra.” As the answer remains the same, just the order of items changes with every passing day.

One evening I was cleaning her tiffin, which smelled oily and spicy. I asked if she swapped her tiffin with any of her friends. “You know the kind of boiled corns we eat at the mall, my friend had it in tiffin. I loved it. And since I have dry snacks everyday, we swapped it for a change”, she answered. I asked why didn't she ask me to make it. “You are mostly short of time, you wouldn't have made it for me, would you?", she questioned.

I felt embarrassed, and later guilty! Making a corn-chaat isn't a big deal. I was always under the illusion that I don't have that kind of time where lots of domestic tasks need to be taken care of. Hence, I never made an attempt. I thought it would give me a run for time if I add one more task in the list. Finally, I decided to give it a shot on Monday. I prepared few things a night before. “Good Night”, Aahana looked at me, "Are you really going to cook me chaat tomorrow? Wouldn't you get late? I hope you'll not be upset if I don't wake up on time and then pack me some dry snacks as punishment…“ “Let's see!” is all I said.

Since she was excited, she helped me by dressing up on her own. Suddenly, she said “WoW! It smells delicious! Can we also add some butter? It's going to be much better than what my friends get. Can you cook some more as I want to share it with them. I’ll tell them you've cooked it in the morning for me! Can I have it every Monday since you'll get time to prepare a bit of it on Sunday…", she went on and on...

I don't know how much she would have enjoyed eating it, but am sure she was extremely happy with the fact that I cooked it for her. She understood the extra effort I took. She appreciated me for the task that actually is my responsibility. Most of the time, as parents, we say "Stop talking. Listen to me". Sometimes, it's good to be on the other side. As a parent, we need to understand the sacrifices our kids are making for us. It’s not only us who are stressed out and struggling against time. They participate in this race too, not as your competitor but as your motivation. The happiness on her face was the real motivation, and behind that smile was my real idol. We don't have to ponder when someone asks us about our inspiration. They are our own people. Younger or elder, depends on the situation.

As a mother, as a parent, I ensure she doesn't lack in any of the things. It's not a competition among mothers to win "The Best Mother" award. It's about understanding the sacrifices that our kids are doing for us. It's about ensuring they aren't really different from others. Apart from a good life, such minor things also add up in our daily happiness!

Knowingly or unknowingly they have sacrificed a lot for us. Even before they understand the real meaning of life, they have accompanied us in our race against time. They are your strength as much as they are your weakness. They have stood by you in every act, every decision that you have taken for and on their behalf. It's time to give it back to them!

Until I write up something else, you search for some quick kids recipes! Happy recipes that lead to your   happiness!

Lunch time, Fun time

Friends, whom we fondly relate as non-relatives, usually meet you when you are wondering "Now what will I do?" I had a similar question running in my mind when one of my friend left the organization to pursue her career abroad. I wondered if I'll have to eat on my own.

Very little time it took me to join a group of some beautiful souls! Such is a group whom I met at my lunch time at work. Different personalities, but similar goal. Such as:

• Enjoy the lunch! 
• Always heat the food, at least for 3 minutes!
• Always look for a chair, first!
• Seat across the TV and watch Glamour Show on any news channel!
• Discuss about upcoming movies, daily serials, or just gossip around known celebrities!
• Exchange ideas! (some ideas, I must tell you, have been completely out of this world :))
• Exchange information! (mostly information is related to either some kind of HR activity or a new joinee)
• Have fun!

We are a group of 5 girls (you can read 'ladies') - VK, HD, IK, DG, and myself, who eat around 1:15PM in our office canteen. We start by pinging each other in our "Lunch group". Most of the time, the first one to ping is VK. The day she is not around, we'll be lazy unless our tummy forces us to ping :) We also discuss some serious issues, exchange ideas and information, or simply investigate what your 'birthday' has to tell about you. Some ongoing, never ending discussions would be - Who shares the birthday with which celebrity, Yahoo links, name each other, etc... We recently named VK as Ms. Lee and Ms. Darwin!

• VK - A sweet girl sitting few cubicles away. A thorough professional by mind, a young bubbly girl at heart. Younger than me by at least 7 years, we tease her for being born so late than the rest of us. If mapped with my 9-year old, she probably finished her schooling when my little girl started hers :0 Nevertheless, a superb mom, who always addresses her daughter as 'Meri beti'...
• HD - A girl whom I never saw with a frown face. Always wears a smile as big as river Nile :) I wasn't knowing her until we started eating together. At first, you'll find her very introvert and shy. But, very little you'll take to discover her original self as 'a vibrant personality', who'll tease you to the core. Her witty sense of humor makes me roll in laughter. A superb friend, an honest soul, and of course, a dedicated SRK fan...
• IK - A girl whom I knew before we started eating together. As far as I can recollect, I know her ever since I am here. On and off, we have fondly interacted either due to common friends or cultural events. A strong girl, absolutely stunning personality, who'll always say 'Aap chalo mein aati hoon' - courtesy her client! Seldom she'll have anything to add in our ongoing discussions, but when will add, we'll applaud :) A brave-heart, sensual, feels cold just like me, and can make impromptu shayris!
• DG - A girl whom I knew as my project-mate. She and I had been working in a common project since long. After she returned from her maternity leave, she joined us for lunch. She is a fast-eater. No, a super fast-eater. She hates heating food and will almost finish her meal even before we would have completed half! Loves chatting and possesses a great interest in politics! A superwoman (that's the way I call her), as she never feels tired!
• Myself - What can I say about myself! It'll be a novel, if I'll start writing :) Lucky am I to find such friends in form of colleagues :)

Dedicated this blog to these beautiful bunch of ladies! Wishing it will bring back smile whenever I'll read it again! More, I hope it will help us rewind these days when we'll be at some distinct places, forwarded happily in our lives, and will think of such a lunch group :)

Ok! Friends, Mamma? Friends?

Friends, when used as verb creates magic. Tenders all the odds. Resolves most of the problems. Melts you like an ice-cream. When used at the right time, and most important, by the right person, it always creates wonders. Heals all the bad thoughts and soothes you from core. 

My 8-year old daughter, Aahana, never forgets to say "Friends, Mamaa...Friends?" As a kid, she is bound to do wrong things, misbehave at times, and irritate us by silly questions. It's normal. Any kid does that and so does she. As a mother, I am bound to be angry, express wrongly, and act dramatic. It's normal. Any mother does that and so do I :(

The trick that works between us is a magical verb, Friends! She ensures she says "Friends, Mamma?" before she says "Sorry, Mamma". She thinks, one needs to be friends first so that it becomes easier for the other person to forgive ones mistakes. She'll always come with an angelic smile and ask me to be friend with her. Later, apologize. 

On my part, there is nothing more than this act of hers that makes me feel guilty for being rude to her. There is an unsaid apology that runs within me at that moment. Things that I would have chosen to say in a louder voice automatically find the correct tone. The understanding that needs to be imparted by me finds a better way. Words that shouldn't have been said make me justify and apologize to her. 

Kids are god's own people. We as grownups lose manners with course of time. Such acts teach us patience and pour calmness. Our bad behaviors hurt them more than any scratch on their knees! Such rude behaviors from our side are poignant reminders for them. However, it's their unconditional love that ensures things close correctly. They do not have a routine or a set responsibility, and thus, they have more time to worry and think over and over again on our reactions. 

My daughter is my good old teacher, who finds patience every time I lose one!

I hope and pray, I get to hear "Ok, Friends, Mamma? Friends?" even after she matures and I grow old :) Regardless of whatever state of life I may be in, I would die for these words :)